She is 7 months and he is just not telling me and his family. He called one Friday night after a few drinks and said he was coming over. I said nothing about anyone's flaws. Don't be a sucker! Show him you have self respect and know your worth. You aren't doing anything other than wasting time. "You don't want to be either, you are not "just" something, you are many great things and you win when you find someone who sees all of that.". I hate it. More often than.not, people who share a child but aren't together anymore, they hate each other, or one hates the other more. When we finally saw each other I took my kids to school and he told me to give him 5 min to talk so I did he said what he needed to say and then he kissed me and hug me so fast I was chocked with my mouth open like what just happened. Or, maybe you expect more from the relationship than is healthy. No body is perfect so you cannot blame people for that. If he doesnt stop saying it after youve asked him to, thats when you do have a problem. Six freaking years. (Explained!). He says it was a mistake, and he loves both me, but he has to be with her because she is carrying his child. Doesn't make any sense that he did that because he left me and our daughter for some new girl he met up at his work. Reach out to the bm and get to know her for yourself. Would any of his family tell you the truth? Shes happy and I try to be civil with the step parent even tho I wanna rip his head off lol. Emotionally abusive, even how she fell pregant, she convinced me through duress to stop using protection, I tried to say I don't think it was a good idea because of her recent behaviour and I didn't want to bring a child into it she yelled "if you don't want to have a baby with me now I never want to have a baby with you!" I cant, so for that being said. III. My son and his father broke up about two montha ago but about a month ago we started hanging out.I think he started to miss us. anyways I'm 100% wanting to get back together with him and I ask him well are we gonna be together now because your the only person is want to be with and he responds "we'll see" like what does that even mean. and I'm the one the broke up with him in the first place. He told me he wanted his family back and began to show me that he meant it and did all the things he should but told me 3 months later she was 5 months pregnant and I should have ran, but I didn't and I decided if he really didn't want to be with her and did what he should to put me at ease, it would be okay. We all make mistakes. Its been almost 3yrs and i still havent met my boyfriends BM. He is the romance ninja and is hell-bent on bringing in Cupid as a stakeholder in your relationship. His bm hates me and always calls me a **** claiming she's dating him anytime we talk. But now my daughter with him is soon to be seven years old. Of course, this could be a sign that hes ready to settle down and take the next step in the relationship, but it could also be a sign that hes not ready and is using this as a way to gauge your reaction. He doesn't have a job at the moment. I mean it's obvious to me, he's using you both. The fact that a woman would give you her all, only for you to throw it away if the baby mama so much as wishes it.rather than feeling sorry for these future women.correct your issues before involving them. My patience is running thin., A lot of times when you're with someone it can be a hard jungle you might would say especially when it comes to babymommas because women will do what ever and will not stop til she gets what she want what the writer should do is right down all the time the girl calls and then keep It in her notes of what time and date she called as. Reply. Sounds messed up to say but I wouldn't date someone with a child. How do you deal with picking schools and the bigger decisions when it comes to your child? If its not about the kid (or kids), do they really need to talk like that? I'm pretty sue that if it was you in that position you would not be saying such things. I would honestly endure any pain or hardship for that to happen. And miserable, angry, furious, and everything else. I see it more of something you might call a female partner who you see as more of a dominant and/or nurturing and caring person in the relationship. Hes Making It Clear He Wants Children with You, Its His Way of Saying Hes Committed to You. Yeap! "Dating a man with kids and feeling left out". I feel you on all that. The origin web server does not have a valid SSL certificate. Guy didnt wish me happy birthday am I wrong to be upset? Ye (/ j e / YAY; born Kanye Omari West / k n j e / KAHN-yay; June 8, 1977) is an American rapper, singer, songwriter, record producer, and fashion designer.. Born in Atlanta and raised in Chicago, West gained recognition as a producer for Roc-A-Fella Records in the early 2000s, producing singles for several artists and developing the "chipmunk soul" sampling style. cuz u know u have to deal with the drama that his baby mama will cuz. Isn't it kind of selfish to date someone when you feel this way? Wasn't really my choice it ended but there was a lot of history there and we both made mistakes. He won't until he's ready. On top of co-parents underestimating the impact having a child with someone can have on future relationships, those who date people with children also underestimate all that can come with such situations. To be stranded during your first pregnancy, financially reliant on this asshole, emotional, hormonal and to be left for dead could maybe make a person slightly insane. SMH. But because my daughters health depends on her mother I'm still a slave to the mom. People are telling me that he will come back, but I do not know if I should be hopeful. etc. I get wanting to soend time with his kids but does this mean hes playing me? Not all men will have a "bond" or be attracted to their baby mama. The problem is i messed up the relationship and now shes afraid ima do it again. Plus upon me getting pregnant, I was going to school myself, working towards my dream. He grew up a little bit and I grew some self-respect because I know that I deserve to be treated with nothing less. If I'd wanted kids I would have had my own. By calling this, I mean that I care about you, I find you . Take it from a man. The Definitive Book of Body Language (on Amazon). Easier said than done. He's cheater on both you and the baby mama! This is a clear signal that he's really into you, wants a relationship, and is showing it by calling you baby. That's my entire time with her boiled down into one reflex of feeling like I was an atm. Meldee09 Follow. But maybe that might change since he wants to be civil he wants to be happy . Not sure what he has told her about me and it doesnt matter given that I have never met her and he's sending me messages about wanting to get back together behind her back as I'm sure she would not be ok with that. But still, he tries to ask me to hook up during exchanges with our kids. should I stay with or leave him. I made sure that all of her needs are met. If this is how he talks, its not going to be the only strange saying he has that youre going to get used to. I'm no longer in love with him and feel like an additional person when I'm with him and his childplus his baby's mother would call in occasionally (which, really was to check in on her son) but i just didn't like it. By entering this site you declare 1 in his life (that honor goes to his kid), he could at least make her No. Is okay so recently he told the kids he would take them to the movies but he never asked the kids what type of movie they wanted to see he bought the tickets and our kids paid no mind to the fact that they didnt know what movie they were going to see until they got to the theatre so when they get there he has a fit because his wife his wifes kids who are his step kids they dont have kids of their own made decision to watch a movie that they all agree on I guess while our kids whom he made plans with were not in on this movie decision making. It may sound petty, but he made me mad one day and I told her, and of course, she believed him when he denied it . I said dont forget you blocked me of all access to you. And there are different takes to alot of things. **** that. Do they see you as a new dad or one of mommy 's new uncles? Take this advice from a woman who is married to a man who has a evil baby mama; just remember everything will work out for the good if your man stand firm when dealing with her and don't give in to her stupid games. But you allow him to cheat with and you also allow him to on you with his woman (ex or wife or other girl friend he had sex with to produce his son) This is a wake up call for you to consider what you want? Your raising a boy who will grow up to be a man and he needs to know and see how a REAL man handles his business. Long story short I end up coming home Monday , and something tells me to go on Facebook and her page. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. I do feel sorry for the kids though, it's not their fault two useless people got together and made a baby! If hes answering the calls and discussing her hairdresser with her then why is it her nessicarily causing the problem. Musiq is an American singer and songwriter whose music incorporates R&B, funk, blues, jazz, gospel, and hip hop influences. Miss Lucy had a Baby. He said he didn't know how to , but he was gonna tell me , he had to tell me. Hey everyone I am confused and I like for someone guy or Girl to give me feedback please I will try to be brief but it will be hard. Community Experts online right now. I think you're probably right that there's still something going on between them. They sent her a pic and all of all of us at the mall he couldnt deny it I mean we werent doing anything we were shopping for the kids and all hell broke loose. I don't have the effort to try again atleast for now . 15 His Communication With Her Is Different From Other Friends. If he is your friend then it would be more likely that he was showing that he wants to be more than just friends with you and you should consider if he shows other signs of it when he is around you. Don't have feelings for her at all. Do I just sit here abd get my heart broken day aftsr day and pretend I don't know? he knew this and thought that if he got me pregnant i would somehow magically want to be with him when in fact it made matters worse. Its hard to explain why, since she was a terrible partner for me, and we weren't compatible at all. Having baby after baby in a fatherless household will keep a poor woman poor. It's like they always have this secret love and "appreciation" for the fact that she birthed his kid(s). Copyright 1997-2022 LoveShack.org. 1 in his romantic life, which doesnt seem to be the case right now. But there is way too much conflict between my ex and I as he cannot follow court orders yet blames me for the conflict for holding him accountable with motions to show cause. If he did call you mama because he is attracted to you then it would be likely that he would show signs of attraction in his body language and behavior which could include: There are more signs of attraction that a guy might show you that get talked about, in an ebook, here. RoyalDanceQueen, January 23, 2017 in Dating. If you want to learn more about body language, a book I would recommend would be The Definitive Book of Body Language (on Amazon). If this is the case, then its a good thing! He does what he wants and when we actually suggest him to do something he goes why is everyone forcing to change me or make me do something. have him smh I pretty sure thats what the first baby mama said bout me too before she officially moved on. It means you act like a mom. When I first met him he had a daughter , and was living with a female other than his daughters mother. All he has to do is pretend like he's treating you special and he gets access. Your IP: It really depends on the person. For a while when I got back he was all about me and didn't pay her much mind he didn't get confirmation it was his son until the boy was like 5/6 and that's when he started being nice and there for her she would tell him all her problems he did the same they ended up ****in on the low i actually was told there dude and I didn't belt it but my dumb ass realized what it was when his car was outside a motel. Fast forward, this dude has a lot of issues, and he done had woman after woman since knowing him. Why is he spending all of his free time with his ex and ignoring you? telling the truth I am going through the same thing, but mine is multiple. She asked me to leave when things got rough in hopes of fixing us. Moved on. I know I try but the shit she says sounds believable..they were together for 8 year there son is 3 I think deep down he still has feelings for her (even tho he talks bad about her ) and now we have a kid together..I think it's the same thing all over again. Married men especially from Africa and South America with girlfriends here. Reply. Reguardless of how long they have been together. Sick of dudes acting like women just go crazy for no reason - yea right! He compares you to her (ya'll could be in a constant competition because if he loves her, he values her more) 2. - Yes. To try to sum up what could be a culmination of mixed emotions may be impossible but you have to build that bridge to get across. You arent wrong in feeling that, a person can only take so much, and patient and understanding for so long before someone pushes too far. If he is texting her and talking to her about things other than the child I personally would not be in a relationship with him. Always pointing his feet at you when you're near. It's not fricken normal, everything else in our relationship is perfect, he's loving, caring, romantic, I am the complete opposite of that "woman" I work, look after myself, I'm supportive and caring, yet this continues to happen, I just don't understand it! Why it's so hard to date guy with baby mamas? 1. Why? "Yes, I'm the one. In short, she took away my ability to come home every day and see my daughter. A few of the signs to look out for that might confirm - or help deny - this are: He's always the one that initiates contact with her or he's always the one replying first. The reality is you can do better. It isnt love. Miss Lucy called the lady with the alligator purse. I and my boyfriend rekindled and we are back together. He should tell her to not call so late at night unless it's an emergency. It all depends on the context and how its used. How is that possible when I dont know the girl who knows your wife? He stays in frequent contact with her. No. The Mother and the child are coming from Honduras and so they have to stay with him in his house because they have no where to go. He says its so she doesnt message me but sometimes I cant tell if thats the real reason why. Constantly brings up his BM on random conversations but doesn't get why I get upset. In order to . Also, if youre in a new relationship, it can come across as a bit presumptuous! but then he made another girl pregnant, and has chosen me over her. Please contact your hosting provider to ensure that an up-to-date and valid SSL certificate issued by a Certificate Authority is configured for this domain name on the origin server. But anywho this guy was actually being an awesome gentle, but just wasn't for me. I would love to be like the others and say he is lying and he is involved with the baby's mom. "Right now yea. I still went out of my way to help him see his son every once in a while but we lost contact for five years. I never re-married but over the years have needed his input with our children. And she has additional four other children with three different baby daddy's. It pisses me off and it's little things she so to get under my skin. He's Making It Clear He Wants Children with You. I haven't met my ex's significant other and it's been almost if not 5 years. You're already hurting and it's only going to get worse. We hadn't had sex for 3 weeks because he'd come home from "work" and sleep on the couch. Or you can say you would tell his baby mama about your affair with him. Strangely enough, I think it's easier for women to get over the father of their kids than for men to get over a babymama. I don't need anything from him but him. I don't know what to do.