17. Surveys show that divorce rates are nonexistent among single people. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. 16. WHAT DID THEY SAY?? 20 Funny Out-of-Office Messages to Inspire Your Own [+ Templates] - HubSpot At minding my own business? My grandfather had a ton of these. Firing back with something a little funny or witty will make them take notice! Even if life is rough, be happy that you're still alive. This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. 1. Average, I think, that sounds about right. and our Do I look like someone whos into cheesy things like romantic relationships?! What to Say When Someone Calls You Cute? - Beezzly Oh, a thought crossed your mind? Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. funny response to are you still alive. Lets face itat my age, Im very pleased to be anywhere. George Burns (comedian), The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive. Joshua Burns, All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage. Lord Byron (poet), Im always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize that Im listening to it. George Carlin (comedian), For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. Johnny Carson (talk show host), I am prepared to meet my maker. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: 52. Everyone has a different sense of humor. Whats with all these questions? If you want me to accept you as you are, Im going to have to lie to myself about liking you. Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. 90. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! Are you serious? The hottest single of the year is me. 88. Youll go far someday. Then you die. Why do you ask? Im always there when I need me. Because Jamaican me crazy! 2. 8. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. Thats no excuse for treating someone like they dont exist, especially since 85% of participants said theyd rather be told upfront that someones not feeling it. (Wriggle your hips) I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat doggy. Does the new one work any better? Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Siri, why am I still single? Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, Infographic: Tips To Continue A Conversation After Responding To How Are You. A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? Maybe because I lick my plate clean after having a scrumptious meal. 69. One common excuse that people come up with when they take a while to reply is Im bad at replying. So, how does average sound? 28 Witty Responses To Ghosting That'll Haunt Them Forever - Bustle This was one of the quickest ways there was to send a message from one person to another. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. The Funniest Replies for People Who Are Always Asked "Are You Okay?" Thats because Im like the last slice of pizza. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. I am better on the inside than I look on the outside. 56. Like "I am not a Sunday morning inside four walls with clean blood and organized drawers. Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? I thought you already knew you were a sociopath. However, you can check out some of our ideas if you want to shake things up and change how you respond to how are you?. [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. The only thing offending me right now is your face. But, they will grow up into a dog. Still, the ghosters ghost on. 3. Whilst university does present some challenges, it does not mean you need to take several days to reply to a message.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_16',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_17',108,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_1');.large-leaderboard-2-multi-108{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Let them know that you're itching to go on a date. You could reply with how you are doing and what has been keeping you busy lately. I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. If you've been stuck inside doing chores and homework all day, and your parents ask you how you are, what response do they expect? " Actually, you're mad" is a version of the classic, rhetorically sophisticated comeback "I'm rubber, you're glue." This one is the white-belt level of "who's mad?" martial arts a simple. provided, of course, that he really is dead." 4. It doesn't mean that you don't actually take showers. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. 35 Best Texts to Respond to a Date that has Ghosted You Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. 5. These comebacks are best for those situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. Haha use this humorous response to make someone laugh-you never know, you just might brighten their day. Read more about Martin here. 70. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. 100+ Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. That's boyfriend material. If someone is going to ask you the same old everyday questions, I dont think Im being unreasonable when I say theyre probably just going through the motions and not really interested in your answer. 4. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. 99 Savage And Funny Answers To "How Old Are You?" 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), 31+ Good Comebacks to Use in an Argument With a Girl, Roommate Is Always in Living Room (How To Resolve This), Roommate Brings Unwanted Guests Home! The person will likely pick up on the joke, making this awkward situation something that can be laughed off. Because they are already taking their time. It is a humorous way of saying they have not heard from you in a while. How to answer when someone asks me, "Are you still alive - Quora Is your family tree a cactus? Just Smile And Nod Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. This is a good response to throw out there. Youre about as sharp as a bowling ball. In the past, one way to send messages was to attach them to a pigeon. Well, I was trying to be invisible but I guess that didnt work. Sure isnt my pay, Im still pretty broke. Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. At least my hair looks amazing. . Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. Talk is cheapbut then again, so are you. Save the high-quality PDF version on your device now. Better than most, but maybe not as well as others. I was gonna try #6 "Any finer I'd be China." Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. How To Answer "Why Are You Single?": 33 Ideas - Elite Daily You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. Or you could be humorous back at them and say "No, I'm not. If you don't want to explain how you're feeling, then don't. However, we wouldn't recommend you to overdone your sarcasm. You were a young man when you last spoke. Doing fairly well, unless you have some contagious disease and are about to infect me . Scroll down! Spiritually? So, you changed your mind? Alive Quotes (560 quotes) - Goodreads If I had a tail, I'd wag it. Im sorry. Are you going to marry me? Figuring out how to respond to a ghoster is all a matter of accepting whats done. 1. Usually, people live and learn. Same thing you're doing, talking to you now. Could have been worse, right. Stop asking me why Im single! On the plus side, a little humor injected into someones day can have a positive impact on their otherwise average day! Happy, and I know it. 62. 18. 39 Heartfelt Poems For Your Mom On Her Birthday, Mom And Daughter Relationship: Everything You Need To Know, 150 Special Ways To Wish Your Long-Distance Girlfriend On Her Birthday, 39 Long-Distance Love Letters To Show Your Love For Him, 51 Good Morning Messages For Her In A Long-Distance Relationship, 24 Beautiful And Touching Poems For People In Long-Distance Relationships, 15 Most Important Things In A Relationship, 61 Great Long-Distance Friendship Quotes And Sayings, 9 Important Qualities Of A Healthy And Happy Relationship. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the. Here are some funny, witty, snarky, smart, and sarcastic responses to some of those annoying everyday questions its hard to avoid: I couldnt possibly cover all of the annoying everyday questions that are probably chipping away at you, but here are some of the most popular: Related 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), Related 29+ Funny Responses to Compliments. How do you usually respond to the question? Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. Oh, well 8. original sound - Tyren Sams. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. Id sue my parents if I had a face like yours. Your lips are moving, but all I hear is blah, blah, blah.. Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?". 22. The following two tabs change content below. Ah, sarcasm. Now I have a much lower opinion of you. Voice command: Alexa, I am your father. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. (This line came from the cartoon show. 13. - Anonymous. Because Im awkward and ugly. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." If you have nothing to add and to share with a person, this saves their day, too. Maybe I am a kindergartner? Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. Chuck Bass? Get your own life first before you try sharing it. Oct 13, 2021 - Explore Beverly Sadler Majkut's board "MAXINE CARTOONS", followed by 864 people on Pinterest. 7. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! Cant complainI have tried, but no one listens. Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. Because they are already taking their time. I dont feel that great, but look! 50. Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." [Read: 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm]. To text, most of us need our thumbs. It's definitely a better reply than the standard, "I'm fine.". Things could be worse I could be you (for siblings ). They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. Your secrets are always safe with me. 13 Wildly Successful People Answer the Question: "What Do You Do?" As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. You look tired. Things can't get much better and you want the world to know. 5 Foolproof Opening Texts to Amp Up Her Attraction FAST - Gotham Club Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. If you've ever worked in an office, used municipal buildings or lived in a city, chances are, you already know what public notices are bland, dull, usually complaining and rarely funny posters that tell us somewhat useful information about all kinds of things. Heart-shattering. [Read: 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you]. What do you say when people ask you that? It lets him know that you love spending time together. I know youre nobodys fool, but maybe youll be adopted someday. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? 93. [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room]. Well, Im hoping its going to get a lot better, I cant lie. Not so much. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. I'm fine. Instead of listening to your opinion, how about I put on some cartoons for you, and get you a juice box? Youre free to go. conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. Maybe their roommate was sick. Cookie Notice You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. 85. I used to think you were a pain in the neck. Do you really care? Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. Theres too much Ghostbusters texting potential to not take advantage of the pun-tastic opportunity. Checklists & Reminders! 28. Who knows, they might just do it. 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent Relationship. I hope you are at your best too. Whatever your thoughts on death may be, I hope you enjoy these random humorous quotes about mortality, death, and dying. Are you Jamaican? 15. Image: wikimedia commons 6. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. My bad, its just your mouth. Tom Lehrer - Wikipedia (bonus points to you if you sing it). 91. Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. but it's just so blunt and funny. Theyre not replying to you, but theyre posting on Twitter. It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. I favour the "How am I what?" What do you mean Im still single. 11. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". Are those space pants? For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. You want to make them laugh, not yell. 1. count_scoopula 6 yr. ago. Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. The person who told you to be yourself gave you some bad advice. Whats a funny way to respond to the question 'Are you still alive?' In fact, they're taking too much of it. Thats because my crush is a fictional character. I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach. Feel my shirt. Then they throw dirt in your face. Im still waiting for my Superman/Wonder Woman. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. Did someone leave your cage open? 2. Search, discover and share your favorite Still Alive GIFs. Here are some of the most humorous replies to "How are you? Nasty comebacks dont require a lot of wit; instead, these will land your target flat on their back and wallowing in self pity. When I eat cake, I flip it upside-down just so I can lick the icing off the plate! 3. Not everybody may appreciate them. Do you have a minute? alive # dead meat # tremors # kill count # survived # reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. I was actually talking to my friend". I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. Nice and dandy, like cotton candy. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. 382 Likes, 344 Comments. "It's a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.". Id love to insult you, but you probably wouldnt understand. It could always have been worse. The friendly ghost would never leave you hanging. "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. I think I am doing alright. That will ensure there will be at least one man who will regret my death. Heinrich Heine (author), Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth. Ernest Hemingway (author), Its funny the way most people love the dead. 86 Funny and Flirty Responses To 'How Are You Doing?' - Monk at 25 The fact youve replied at all has come as a shock. Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. What's your sign? I was doing great, before you came. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? 8 Funny Replies To "Hahaha" Text Better Responses Still Alive synonyms - 44 Words and Phrases for Still Alive I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. Some of us are just destined to walk this world alone. Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. still alive 810 GIFs. 5. Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." Discover what these funny, yet morbid, jokes about burial and death have in common in this hilarious piece about "Alive Jokes". Me being single is just a conspiracy! Dont get caught with nothing to say. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. 71. Turning the question around on them without actually having to answer? Well, are you? I am doing wellor that could be my anti-depressants speaking. Nothing that you probably cant figure out if you tried. Although for some, traveling to your partner might not be an option. You do the work of three men: Larry, Moe, and Curly. 31. Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. 61. Just because you're using the "what if" format doesn't mean you can ask anything. IDK, pick your favorite fictional player. Nevertheless, life must go on, and sometimes you just have to go with the flow, as they sayeven if you don't want to discuss your relationship status! Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. Your relationship status is your business alone (and your partners, if you have one). Socrates (philosopher), "The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." Which one you use would depend on particular circumstances, but in the example you gave, I think "still alive" probably works best. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Nevertheless, it can be a great approach to start a lively discussion! It's quite the accomplishment. Arthur lived a short life, but none could doubt that it was a good one. "See, I will finally make you smile.". Is everything stable at your end? Your response should depend on the rapport you share with the sender. However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. After all, every single day that you're still alive is a good day overall. Mentally? Youre not as bad as everyone says. We all grow up as we get older. But, because they have taken so long to reply, you have grown older and wiser. *wink*. Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. It could be raining men, and Id still be single. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". 1. Thats because Im still waiting for you. Your attempt at social interaction to be polite is hereby acknowledged. How much are you willing you pay me if I tell you? Are you going to help me have a good day? He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? Overwatch 2 Friendly Reminder To Leave a LIKE & SUBSCRIBE, ThanksJoin this channel to get access to perks:https://www.youtube.com/cha. ", This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. You could totally take the high road: Lose their number and forget about them altogether or, you could do that after sending them a final funny (but fierce) text to bid your time together adieu. Thats why Im rooting for your penis. I learned my lesson. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. 74. response, because I need clarity in my interactions. *sips wine/tea*. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. If youre going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. As unlikely as this is, it might be wise to double-check. I dont think youre stupid. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. I cant afford to die; Id lose too much money. George Burns (comedian), I do not fear death. 101 Funny And Witty Responses To The Question "How Are You?" Another common excuse that younger people tend to give when they take a long time to reply is Ive been busy with uni. Let's face itat my age, I'm very pleased to be anywhere." George Burns (comedian) "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." Joshua Burns. Why some QAnon believers think JFK Jr is still alive - and about to Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." I'm happy! Depends who you ask, if you ask me, it was fine. Reply. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. funny response to are you still alive - claudiovoiceovers.com And maybe thats the reason why theyre taking so long to reply. [Read: How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever]. Financially? 29. Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. Alternatively, you can let them know you are doing well but still need time to process your emotions. If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. (Use a sexy tone). 350 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic. What? How to Respond to An Insult With Humor? 41+ Best Comebacks Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. 45 Funny Memes About Life in 2023 - Happier Human It's best to say when you're in a horrible situation, like in a class you can't stand. "It's your ego that wants to lash out," Winter tells Bustle. Because if you are, youre doing it right. No, not really. 38. Maybe this person really likes you, and they have a heart condition. Your hair looks great! I'm Not Sure How to Answer That!? Sometimes, it can be hard thinking on your feet, especially when youre joking around with your friends or in the midst of a heated exchange. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now.
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